Here's the deal... I have a bad habit of engaging in various thought experiments, that lead to an interesting conclusion in my head. I then pontificate as if I have mined a new truth. Then God uses a combination of experience and life events to teach me that the motto, 'Physician heal thyself' is rather applicable. At the conclusion I feel sheepish and foolish.
Take today for example... I spent some time in contemplative thought. The conclusion of which was an interesting thought, that I turned into a tweet via my twitter account, (due to my linking twitter and Facebook it appeared there also).
The tweet was: The degree which people think they are tolerant/forgiving is inversely proportional to the actual degree the universe requires it of them.
This was the direct culmination of spending some time on twitter watching people engage in various activities of incivility and false piety. I found myself feeling rather indignant. It ended in the tweet.
The rest of the day was spent being reminded frequently as to how imperfect and in need of as much grace as anyone else. I lost my temper more than once. I was judgemental at times. I had a short fuse with those around me. In short, I found myself wondering why I ever opened my mouth in the first place. The thought, 'what does the world need with another voice adding to the cacophonous madness, even if it is my own' struck me.
I found myself thinking the thought, 'I never learn'. This string of events happen to me often. I do find myself in the midst of this moment often. I open my mouth and speak only to discover that I am in as much need of heeding the advice I am offering as anyone who might happen upon my random pontification.
I considered all of this at length as I walked my path of thorns the rest of the day. I came away thinking not that I should shut my yap entirely. Rather that I need to remember and speak frequently that more often than not when I am speaking, I am speaking to myself more than anyone else. I need to accept that the things that occur to me, strike a cord with me for a reason. Sometimes it is nothing more than something I need to work on. Other times it is something I need to remember.
I have to keep in mind that grace is abundant. Growth only comes in the midst of the revelation of truth for us all, myself most of all. Accepting first my imperfections in life and in relationship with those around me is the starting point of wisdom. Not from the place of stubborn refusal to change. Rather accepting it from the place of having the full spectrum of who I am revealed to me so that healing can begin, so that times of refreshing and renewal can come, so that growth can happen.
Acceptance from that place, is healthy. Acceptance from there is healthy. Acceptance from there is what God was trying to get across to me all day long. I do wish that I learned these lessons the easy way. It would not be consistent with who I am, and who God made me to be if I did.
Let me sum up by saying this to you, my reader, I am not perfect. I make mistakes. I sin. I fall short. My sins are no worse or better than yours. We all sin differently, but sin is a binary, not gradient based item. It is a one or a zero. In saying that I am saying that I am not any better than you or than anyone else.
I get that my experiences are not universal. I get that there are more paths to ultimate enlightenment than I can fully grasp. When I speak, I am trying to speak from a place of grace illuminated by truth as I have come to understand it. If your experience differs from mine, or if you come to different conclusions than I do, it does not me right and you wrong, or vice versa. It just makes us different, nothing more.
If you are trying each day to live the life granted you by your creator to the best of your ability, then you are my brother and my sister. If you like me understand your limitations and your failures as well as anyone else, then all I can say is welcome to the club. Please help keep me honest. I am just doing the best I can as a man looking through a glass darkly.
Your patience, and grace is genuinely appreciated.
Take today for example... I spent some time in contemplative thought. The conclusion of which was an interesting thought, that I turned into a tweet via my twitter account, (due to my linking twitter and Facebook it appeared there also).
The tweet was: The degree which people think they are tolerant/forgiving is inversely proportional to the actual degree the universe requires it of them.
This was the direct culmination of spending some time on twitter watching people engage in various activities of incivility and false piety. I found myself feeling rather indignant. It ended in the tweet.
The rest of the day was spent being reminded frequently as to how imperfect and in need of as much grace as anyone else. I lost my temper more than once. I was judgemental at times. I had a short fuse with those around me. In short, I found myself wondering why I ever opened my mouth in the first place. The thought, 'what does the world need with another voice adding to the cacophonous madness, even if it is my own' struck me.
I found myself thinking the thought, 'I never learn'. This string of events happen to me often. I do find myself in the midst of this moment often. I open my mouth and speak only to discover that I am in as much need of heeding the advice I am offering as anyone who might happen upon my random pontification.
I considered all of this at length as I walked my path of thorns the rest of the day. I came away thinking not that I should shut my yap entirely. Rather that I need to remember and speak frequently that more often than not when I am speaking, I am speaking to myself more than anyone else. I need to accept that the things that occur to me, strike a cord with me for a reason. Sometimes it is nothing more than something I need to work on. Other times it is something I need to remember.
I have to keep in mind that grace is abundant. Growth only comes in the midst of the revelation of truth for us all, myself most of all. Accepting first my imperfections in life and in relationship with those around me is the starting point of wisdom. Not from the place of stubborn refusal to change. Rather accepting it from the place of having the full spectrum of who I am revealed to me so that healing can begin, so that times of refreshing and renewal can come, so that growth can happen.
Acceptance from that place, is healthy. Acceptance from there is healthy. Acceptance from there is what God was trying to get across to me all day long. I do wish that I learned these lessons the easy way. It would not be consistent with who I am, and who God made me to be if I did.
Let me sum up by saying this to you, my reader, I am not perfect. I make mistakes. I sin. I fall short. My sins are no worse or better than yours. We all sin differently, but sin is a binary, not gradient based item. It is a one or a zero. In saying that I am saying that I am not any better than you or than anyone else.
I get that my experiences are not universal. I get that there are more paths to ultimate enlightenment than I can fully grasp. When I speak, I am trying to speak from a place of grace illuminated by truth as I have come to understand it. If your experience differs from mine, or if you come to different conclusions than I do, it does not me right and you wrong, or vice versa. It just makes us different, nothing more.
If you are trying each day to live the life granted you by your creator to the best of your ability, then you are my brother and my sister. If you like me understand your limitations and your failures as well as anyone else, then all I can say is welcome to the club. Please help keep me honest. I am just doing the best I can as a man looking through a glass darkly.
Your patience, and grace is genuinely appreciated.
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